If you are in the middle of a seance and the lights go out and objects begin to fly around the room; I think it's a good time to close your eyes, smile and make a wish, because what else are you going to do?
When you ask a creepy guy in the alley what his name is and his response is, "Iam Gonnakillyou"; you should turn and run away, cause I'm pretty sure that's not his real name.
I met this vampire the other day. I walked up to him and asked, "Hey, aren't vampires suppose to be ugly and scary." His response was, "Well, I'm really hot and have a lot of charisma." Then I thought, "Wow, what an asshole."